We all have them. Lets be honest with each other. There is no absolutely good person in this world. At any moment any one person can succumb to to something that would make them fall from grace. I am a terrible person. This is honesty. I am not a good person by any means. Granted I am better than some but I am definitely worse than others. If there is a hell and although it is unfortunate I am most likely going to end up there due to past mistakes. I am no angel.
Our dark places. I mean think. REALLY think. When there’s an accident why do you slow down to look at it? Why even though your eyes should be on the road you make every effort to turn your head in order to see what happened? Because it’s interesting to us. Because it’s something broken – something different in this world that is always the same. We WANT something to have happened. “Oh it’s just a fender bender whatever”. keep driving, fuck it. “OH SHIT DUDE THAT GUY IS FUCKING WRAPPED AROUND A TREE?” slow down, turn your head, turn off the radio, even take fucking pictures. We’re all a little twisted I think. I think some are just more honest about it than others.
Some people like the order we live in. The world we live in. The plain, the boring, the uninspired and ultimately the safe. Kudos to them! I think if everyone was like that then we would all be a lot better off. Sure we’d be boring as all hell and life would be mundane and uninteresting but hey. We wouldn’t have people doing stupid things for fun because they’re bored. There would be no chaos and no danger. When I stop to think about some of the fucked up shit that’s happened in this world perpetrated by others I look at it and sometimes think…yeah he got what he deserved you know but…did he just do it because he couldn’t take the boredom anymore? What if the reason people break isn’t just because of sadistic desires and voices in their heads? I mean yeah those are huge reasons but what about the people who just break because they can’t handle the fact that everything is the same? That eventually they will die and ultimately be unimportant? That they will no longer be capable of thought anymore? To feel? To touch? To love? What then? What if these thoughts bore down on someone for so long they just…broke? I could see it happening. When I speak of change I don’t mean a nuclear bomb hits and all earth gets wiped out. When I say change I don’t mean a zombie apocalypse happens and we’re all fucked. I mean chaos. Some people want chaos….but believe it or not they want chaos that’s comfortable to them. That’s another thing. Some people are most comfortable and relaxed with the mundane…what about those that are only comfortable and relaxed within chaos? Those people are only trying to be comfortable and make sense of things in their own way. They reach their own conclusion on how to live and their own world to live in. Even if it is pure chaos and completely fucked up.
Don’t get me wrong I’m not defending these people. I could care less about psychopaths or whatever and I think if you do the crime you should do the time absolutely. I’m just thinking out loud here about some stuff that’s been going around in my head. Maybe I think too much. Thanks for reading. I wasn’t angry writing this just a little depressed.